Dating can be a nerve wracking experience. What’s the other person like? Will you hit it off? Will you have anything in common? What will you wear? Do you look okay? How fancy is the restaurant? What should you eat?

That’s a lot to worry about, not to mention if you’re an individual living with incontinence! Don’t let it get you down. Being prepared, and keeping a few tips in mind, can help take the stress out of the situation and let you confidently enjoy dating…and maybe even have some fun, which is the point of it all, isn’t it?

Be Prepared

Planning ahead and being prepared is half the battle. Ensure that you pack adequate changing, cleaning, and disposal supplies. Many absorbent pads come in small wrapped packages that can conveniently fit inside a pocket or purse.  There are also products that have odor-preventing features which can help you avoid any potentially embarrassing smells, however carrying a small amount of perfume or cologne is a good idea, if not only to help you smell good (just be careful not to overdo it!)  

Be Familiar with your Surroundings

If possible, suggest a restaurant or café that you’re familiar with so that you know where the bathrooms are. This will allow you to easily and conveniently excuse yourself to go to the washroom to change. Another thing to do is double voiding (emptying the bladder twice, 10-15 minutes apart) before your date, which can help you avoid having to frequent the bathroom too often. If you’re stressed about having a severe episode of incontinence, have an escape plan ready. Have a nearby location available where you can take the time to properly clean and change yourself. It’s okay to have a cover story and bring it up early on in the date. Something as simple as texting a friend to give you a call pretending to be a relative who needs to be picked up from the hospital will work fine. Just make sure you let your date know that you’re not ditching him/her and that you would love to have a second date another time (or if you’re not into them, you can simply escape!).

Be Confident

Confidence is attractive! Not only should you be confident for your date, you should be confident in your ability to manage incontinence. You don’t need to bring it up during the date if you don’t want to, and should only bring it up if you feel comfortable doing so. Remember, incontinence is a physiological condition and is nothing to be embarrassed about, just as a person with a severe nut allergy wouldn’t be embarrassed to ask if a dessert contains peanuts.

Be Comfortable

Depending on the severity of your incontinence, there are a large variety of products available. Choose one that you feel comfortable in and isn’t noticeably visible under your pants. If you are required to wear absorbent underwear or an adult diaper rustling sounds can be a concern. Be sure to wear a product that has a cloth-like backing to keep any potential noise to a minimum.  If you plan on doing any physical activities like dancing, bowling, or mini-putting, research products that are designed for active individuals. Wearing the right product in the right size will help you forget you’re even wearing it!

These tips should help you have a fun an enjoyable date. Lastly, remember that your date is looking to get to know you, and if you hit it off with them, the fact that you live with incontinence shouldn’t be a big deal. 

Talking with your daughter about her incontinence may not be a conversation she is comfortable with, nor a conversation that you are keen to have, but it is necessary.  Managing this condition is only going to become more difficult for her, so the more support you can give her the better off she will be. 

Here are a few key tips that may help you when discussing your daughter’s incontinence with her.

Be Patient Don’t let stress from work or the home come into this conversation.  If you become irritated with your daughter, you may limit how openly she is willing to talk about this sensitive and potentially embarrassing issue in her life.  If you think your partner would be better suited to having this conversation with her, then by all means, let him or her.  This is not a popularity competition, so doing what makes your daughter feel the most comfortable and secure about the issue should take priority.

Don’t Lead the Conversation towards Diapers Though adult diapers and other incontinence products will help both of you, bringing them up every time you and your child talk is never a good idea. In fact, if you’re discussing incontinence for the first time, the goal and content of your conversation should be about informing your child about the prevalence of the problem and to persuade them into going to the doctor with you for a medical evaluation.

Read as Much as You Can about Incontinence There is a vast amount of literature online and offline about incontinence.  Read as much as you can on the topic so that you can provide the answers your daughter is looking for. If you get stumped at any point, be truthful and admit that you don’t know about it but are willing to research it with her.

Be Sympathetic Most parents, especially dads, can appear a little less caring while discussing this issue since they believe that sympathy is for the weak. However, you need to keep in mind that your daughter is opening up to you because they trust you and want your help. If you aren’t the least bit sympathetic to their situation, they may close up and refuse to discuss their condition. So, show sympathy throughout the conversation, avoid making any kind of jokes, and be careful of your choice of words around your daughter.

If you daughter gets confrontational, avoid a fight with her, as she needs you in this time of need.   Be sympathetic, empathetic and well-informed to help her manage her incontinence. 

As the parent of a teenage girl diagnosed with teen incontinence, you may have been investing in feminine hygiene pads. However, what you may not know is that these pads are not enough for your daughter. In fact, if she is susceptible to excreting a large amount of urine or feces, she is bound to end up with a big mess. Besides, not changing this pad regularly can cause her to develop numerous health issues due to the germs of both excretions.

Therefore, if you want to provide your teen with the most protection while ensuring her health, you need to consider other incontinence products designed for her gender. Here are three you should consider for her instead.

Incontinence Underwear There are two types of incontinence panties for girls: disposable and washable. Disposable ones are usually made of plastic and come with incontinence pads that differ in size depending on how heavily your daughter’s incontinence excretions are. On the other hand, washable incontinence underwear looks the same as regular underwear but includes a moisture resistant pouch where your daughter will place the absorbent liner.  Again, the size of the liner will depend on how much control your daughter has on her bladder or bowel movements.

Special Incontinence Pads They look just like a normal feminine hygiene pad, but these are usually longer and thicker to absorb quickly. In addition, they are more expensive, which can deter many parents from investing in them if they’re on tight budgets. However, compare a few extra dollars to the cost of numerous gynecologist visits and you will definitely choose to go for incontinence pads. These aside, only go for this option if your daughter doesn’t suffer from heavy incontinence and causes a big mess.

Tampons and Vaginal Inserts Another option girls should consider is using tampons and prescribed vaginal inserts. These put pressure on the bladder to ensure fewer accidents. In addition, many companies claim that these products can help cure your little princess from incontinence by helping the pelvic floor muscles regain their strength. However, before you hurry up and buy these, you need to consult with your daughter’s physician first. These products don’t always suit everyone, especially girls under 15. So, don’t take any step without checking with the doctor.

Now all of these are products which your daughter can use round the clock. However, if you want to reduce the chances of any accidents, you need to make sure that she takes extra measures at school and during sports. Once at home, you can help her manage incontinence (especially at night) using waterproof bedding and other products which can reduce your laundry efforts.

Another important thing you should teach her is how to dispose of these discreetly, especially when she’s out with friends or having a sleepover. This is why there are so many guides on this site to help you with this aspect.

Finally, whichever product you choose, make sure that it gels well with your daughter as well since she has to use it and not you. Besides, taking her opinion will give her self-esteem a much needed boost, especially since teen incontinence may have robbed her of it. So, follow all of this information religiously so that both you and your daughter can enjoy a peaceful, uneven